What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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