There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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