I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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