Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize