Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
We are two peas in an std pod
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Randomize