So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
