5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
