after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Randomize
