You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
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"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
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what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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