also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
