his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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