I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
