we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
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We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
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I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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