he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
