My nipple is on Facebook.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
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I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
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It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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