The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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