Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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