Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
