I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
should my penis look like a turkey
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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