Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
