Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
