Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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