Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
