Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
