Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
