There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
