yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
