i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
