just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
