An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂