WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
