I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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