anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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