You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize