you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
