also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Randomize
