Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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