Texts From Last Night

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  (716): View more from New York

  I can text with my tongue

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  (716): I can text with my tongue http://tfl.nu/gbw1
  Replies (23) Good night (3388) Bad night (754)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes

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  (815): you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes http://tfl.nu/koyr
  Replies (195) Good night (999) Bad night (8425)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class

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  (609): Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class http://tfl.nu/440m
  Replies (29) Good night (10298) Bad night (1221)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.

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  (404): I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck. http://tfl.nu/f2m7
  Replies (45) Good night (26203) Bad night (1513)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am

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  (250): They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am http://tfl.nu/0rv3
  Replies (3) Good night (3349) Bad night (1270)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"

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  (608): you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?" http://tfl.nu/0sa8
  Replies (19) Good night (10976) Bad night (1409)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.

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  (512): You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye. http://tfl.nu/ovu6
  Replies (28) Good night (4355) Bad night (2784)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.

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  (778): She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up. http://tfl.nu/0zw1
  Replies (4) Good night (1225) Bad night (769)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.

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  (904): Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time. http://tfl.nu/ddkn
  Replies (4) Good night (2181) Bad night (621)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.

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  (978): If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room. http://tfl.nu/2jpn
  Replies (4) Good night (682) Bad night (738)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms

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  (970): Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms http://tfl.nu/zzyw
  Replies (1) Good night (575) Bad night (916)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.

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  (404): I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/xlvi
  Replies (1) Good night (717) Bad night (461)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.

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  (240): I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator. http://tfl.nu/kcd0
  Replies (1) Good night (658) Bad night (368)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Also I found and fixed my beer gun.

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  (570): Also I found and fixed my beer gun. http://tfl.nu/qi6j
  Replies (2) Good night (599) Bad night (293)
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  (562): View more from California

  So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch

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  (562): So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch http://tfl.nu/gm5w
  Replies (8) Good night (867) Bad night (386)

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