Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
We have so much sex to catch up on
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
