Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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