The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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