If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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