She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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