I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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