Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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