Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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