A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize
