I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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