so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize