TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
