so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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